Talk about a kick in the karmic teeth.

Could you imagine commissioning a grand castle, then dying two years before it was built? That happened to King Wilhelm I of Württemberg in the 1860s in the town of Langenargen.

Good ole Willie’s death didn’t stop the construction of Schloss Montfort. Sorry, I guess I should say his death didn’t stop the reconstruction, because Castle Monfort was originally a medieval one.

As much as I just love history, the castle being a prison (and all that jazz) is nothing compared to its view of Lake Constance. And it’s not just some far-off distant sighting of the Bodensee, either. Nope, it sits right up against this famous lake.

Oh, I just love this lake. You can do all sorts of exciting water sports, or just lounge around beachside and the yearly regatta.

The sailing regatta isn’t the only cultural event, ya know. Musical concerts are constantly being held during the summer; and come the Christmas season, you’ll just love shopping at the Christmas market.

Another religious event comes in the form of a huge Carnival celebration (usually) in February. I say usually because Carnival’s date changes according to the Christian calendar.

Did I mention Langenargen was on the Upper Swabian Baroque Route? No? Well, it is. ;-)

Don’t worry, I’m not going to leave you hanging there.

Since the town is on this epic scenic route, that means you’ll get to see some amazingly beautiful Baroque architecture. One of the best places is the Baroque Church of St. Martin (built 1718), although its St. Anne Cemetery Chapel is of Romanesque design.

In all fairness, it is believed that the 18th century St. Martin Church is really about a thousand years older than that.

Another historical building in Langenargen is the Cavalier House (19th century). It’s now a charming museum with all sorts of historical and art exhibits.

One last stop before you run off to the Bodensee again.

Everyone that comes to Langenargen stops at the bridge over the River Argen. Yeah, sure, a bridge — big deal.

No, really it is a big deal. This suspension bridge is just an amazing feat of 19th century German engineering.

Now that I think about it, all of Langenargen is feat of fine German engineering — even if Willie I didn’t get to see it.

Ha-ha, Germany cracks me up.

I’m laughing at the fact that Germany has eight (yes, eight) towns with name Forst; four of them in the Rhineland-Palatinate alone, and this one here is in Baden.

Even funnier knowing that Forst actually translates to Forest! Confusing isn’t the word, is it? :-)

As lovely as the other Forsts might be, you won’t confuse Forst (Baden) with any other because this town of not even 8,000 residents sits on both the Baden Asparagus Route and the Bertha Benz Memorial Route.

Yeah, you’ve heard of the Bertha Benz Route before, haven’t you? No? It’s a route that highlights the trailblazing scenic route that Mrs. Benz and her two sons took in the 1880s in her husband’s Benz Patent Motorcar #3. Quite revolutionary — and a remarkable woman, no less.

In honor of the motorcar, you can also follow the Asparagus Route by automobile (or by bicycle) along this 136km scenic route.

I would, however, tell you the best time to take this route is between April and June — as that’s when the King’s Veggie is in season. It’s not uncommon to find either the green or white variety on many menus in local restaurants during this time.

Oh, good food — great scenery — and a three day Forest Lake Festival every year. Cool!

Even if you aren’t following either one of Forst’s scenic routes, you can still enjoy some sightseeing. I would recommend seeing the Bar Vicarage building from 1751, the Jägerhaus (that would be a hunting lodge) built in 1747, and the late 19th century Town Church.

If a castle is a must-see on your sightseeing To-Do list, then look no further than Schloss Bruchsal. OK, it might be in the neighboring town of Bruchsal (only 3km away), but the Baroque and Rococo castle has been painstakingly restored after being gutted by air raids in 1945. The museum houses a mechanical musical instruments museum, and a local history museum.

After a gander at this grandiose castle, there’s no way on Earth you’ll ever confuse Baden’s Forst with any other in all of Germany — or the rest of Europe, for that matter.

Would you believe that the Lower Bavarian town of Fürstenzell is made up of 124 (!) districts, towns, and villages? I don’t even think I could sit here and type them all — I’d be here until the cows came home & then some. ;-)

But, lucky you, you don’t have to visit all 124 districts, though that certainly would be nice. And if you’ve made it this far to see Fürstenzell there are a number of sites that do need to be seen.

One of them, believe it or not, is a Feng-Shui golf course. Yeah, a golf course (the only one of its kind) that’s been totally designed using this ancient method — oh, and it’s got views of the Alps to boot.

You’ll find the Feng-Shui golf course at the Hotel ViktoriaQuelle, that also has all sorts of spa treatments like using mud from the Moorlands, a Kneipp area, a sulphur pool, and a relaxing sauna.

Ahh, I’m feeling better and less stressed already…

It is so hard to tear yourself away from all that pampering, but you’ve still got to see the Stone Age grave hills, a 15th century Pilgrimage church, a fountain that’s said to have healing powers (it’s known as the Heiligenbrunnen), and an umpteen number of hiking and cycling trails.

And as if the spa isn’t a big enough attraction, you’ve got to see the Church of the Assumption. It was originally a medieval masterpiece, but is now one of the most beautiful Baroque churches I’ve ever seen. Everywhere you look in this opulent church is a delight to the eyes, as well as the soul — the frescoes look as if they were created by Heaven itself.

The church sits within a former Cistercian Monastery complex (dating to around the 12th/13th centuries), and its Rococo decorated library is simply stunning.

Did I miss anything? Oh yea, the 13th century Portenkirche Fürstenzell — another Cistercian church.

Sure you can hang out in Passau (that’s only 15km away), but I think I’d rather spend my time at the spa and one of the most magnificent churches in the world.

Every summer millions of kids all over the planet are out of school for a couple of months. Every summer millions of parents are ready to pack their kids off to camp, grandmom’s house, or some other destination.

I would like to suggest Hesse’s town of Frielendorf, where you’ll find the Children’s Paradise Hotel.

It’s not a “hotel” in the traditional sense, but a complex that has everything under the sun to keep your young ones entertained (a totally tire them out) with everything from bungee jumping, a jungle gym, miniature golf, ping pong, and some sort of bouncy apparatus.

There’s even an adult area, so the grown-ups can have a bit of peace & quiet.

Ahh, the sounds of silence!

For outdoor fun for the whole family the Ferienwohnpark Silbersee is it. There is an annual marathon here; and you don’t have to run to have a good time.

Other sporting activities in Frielendorf are inline skating, bowling, miniature golf, and moutainbiking. My favorite is the Alpine Run, where you’re careening down a track on a sled of some sort.

If you want a bit of history with your recreational vacation, Frielendorf has the medieval Spike Tower (Spießturm), which unofficially showed the boundary between Lower and Upper Hesse.

Over at the church of St. Johannes, Sunday services are still held after almost 900 years. That’s a whole lot of sermons. ;-)

Frielendorf even has a few museums (that’s right, keep the kids walking — they’ll get tired, I promise). There’s a museum that’s all about coal mining and a village history museum.

The town even has an old Jewish cemetery (if the gate’s locked — just go to the municipal office, they’ll let you in); and another Jewish cemetery is in nearby Großropperhausen.

Ask the Children’s Paradise Hotel if they will let you drop the kids off for a while — in case you want to have a good time at the annual Summer Festival and take in an outdoor summer concert.

Because I mentioned that Wörrstadt in the Rhineland-Palatinate was grand enough for a saint in the title, I’m going to just jump right to it.

How do I know Wörrstadt is good enough for a saint? Simply because one preached here.

That’s right, St. Boniface preached right here at Wörrstadt’s St. Lawrence Church back in the 9th century. And, yes, that’s how long the church has been here. But, don’t split hairs on me…

The church has definitely undergone many changes, from its original 9th century beginnings, to it being a “fortified” church of the 12th century (hey, life in the Middle Ages wasn’t easy), to its 18th century overhaul, which is what you see today.

One thing in Wörrstadt predates even Boniface, that’s the “Long Stone,” a natural landmark that’s been around since Frankish Times (that would be like 3rd century A.D.).

Wörrstadt’s just perfect for you if you love those romantic looking half-timbered houses. Make sure you got your camera ready!

Inasmuch as I’m a lover of German history, even I can’t bear to stay away from the cultural side of Wörrstadt for too long. Wine making is big business here, so enjoy the Hoffestivals (one at the end of July, the other in August), or the Wörrstadter Markt at the end of August, and then there’s the obligatory Christmas Market in early/mid-December.

Hey, all the better to buy your friends and family a good German wine, I would say. ;-)

Can’t wait that long to come? You can always shop during Wörrstadt’s weekly market (Saturdays, 9am-1pm).

If you’re exceptionally lucky, you’ll be here for any of Wörrstadt’s comedy, cabaret, or jazz concerts (held throughout the year), or the outdoor Metal/Rock concert in the village of Neuborn.

Neurborn is where you’ll find this awesome pool, filled with cold spring water that’s solar heated to quite comfortable. Ahh, relaxing.

I think St. Boniface would approve. Don’t you? :-)

Usually I start off telling you about how beautiful, or wonderful, or charming a town is. I’m not going to do that about Wriezen, a town that’s mere footsteps from the Polish border.

Nope, I’m going to tell you that its St. Mary’s Church is partially in ruins; which is actually part of its charm.

Oh, I guess I just told you its charming — so nevermind what I said in the first paragraph. ;-)

Seriously, you really do need to see its Church of St. Mary. While the rest of this late Gothic church remains standing, it’s choir has remained in ruins since it was destroyed in 1945. Either way, it’s the venue for many concerts in the summer — and the acoustics are fantastic.

I’m also gonna go out on a limb, and say that I think you’ll find the Baroque Savings Bank building a stunner too. No wonder banks want your money… they want to build these visually stunning buildings. ;-)

Much of Wriezen’s history and the story behind many of its buildings (like the Old Distillery, huge Brick Kiln, and its Schulzendorf Manor) can be learned by just a simple visit to the City Museum.

Make sure you leave enough time to see its Jewish Cemetery, its Mountain Cemetery (with World War I memorial), the Port (built 1902), and its game reserve.

Looks like you’ll be here for a while…

But, I think another way to learn about a place is during its festivals. Hey, you don’t really know someone until you’ve lived or partied with them. And you’ve got plenty of opportunities to do just that in Wriezen.

Hmm, give me a moment — I don’t want to leave anything out…

OK, I’ve got ’em all now (sorry if they’re out of order).

Wriezen’s got a Flower Market in May, two Harvest Festivals (one in late August, the other in early September), Oktoberfest (late Sept.), a Dragon Festival (October), a Festival of Lights at the end of November, and the year ends with a Christmas Market and holiday concerts in December.

Didn’t I tell ya the acoustics at St. Mary’s were terrific?

Along the River Rhine between Koblenz and Andernach (and right on the river Rhine) is the town of Weißenthurm. Oh, and funnily enough, it’s famous for its Weißer Turm or White Tower.

Got it? Weißer Turm — Weißenthurm — Weißer Turm — Weißenthurm. :-)

Before I send you out into one of the most incredibly beautiful regions of Germany, I do need to tell you that Weißenthurm’s White Tower is an excellent example of 14th century architecture — standing some four storeys high.

But, long before the town’s medieval residents built this sturdy structure, Weißenthurm was on a 1st century A.D. Roman Road. So, it’s no stretch to know that many Roman archaeological finds have been discovered in the area. Just as well as quite a number of Bronze Age artifacts (including weapons from around 1800-1250 B.C.).

Ouch, kind of makes the Catholic Parish Church of Weißenthurm (built in the 1830s) seem not that old in comparison, does it? Ah, who cares — the church holds an annual festival every year in June, so who cares if it ain’t that old — it’s fun.

But, even older than the Romans and the Bronze Age are the volcanoes. Yup, Weißenthurm is conveniently located right along the Eifel, once a large volcanic region of Germany. Check out the Volcano Park to hike or cycle around these long extinct giants.

For a creepy thrill, you’re close to Eltz Castle. It’s said to be haunted by the spirits of medieval knights. Creepy ain’t the word for it — bone chilling might be a better adjective, don’t ya think?

Nearby Schloss Bürresheim (in nearby Mayen) might not be reported to have ghosts, but I find that hard to believe. It was built in the 12th century — so, that’s a lot of history and life lived within its walls.

Ghosts or not, I wouldn’t mind living in this schloss, with its towers and turrets.

It’ll be hard to tear yourself away to cycle around the network of bike paths, or any number of hiking trails. But, trust me — you’ll be handsomely rewarded. Oh, look — I’m already talking like nobility — see I do need to own a castle. ;-)

I guess I’ll just have to be satisfied with sitting around Weißenthurm’s many restaurants, pubs, and beer gardens. Care to join me?

Num, num, num. Oh, sorry, I was just eating my way through the Thuringian town of Weida. What? It’s not like Germany’s just known for castles and cuckoo clocks. There are all sorts of culinary treats awaiting to be eaten.

So, eat at will. You will if you’re here on the first weekend of September for the Weidscher Kuchenmarkt (Cake Market). Not only are there lots of stalls set up to sell all sorts of household goods, the main attraction is cake. In between bites the kids are singing, women are competing for cake queen, and guys are drinking as much beer as humanly possible.

I think I’ve found heaven. ;-)

Even if it’s not the cake festival, you can still eat cake in-between sightseeing. The biggest attraction (other than cake) is the Osterburg; a 12th century military installation that was also a castle and a prison. Its dungeon was damaged during World War II.

Also from the 12th century is the church of St. Peter, with the town’s Stadtmauer added later on. Those medieval guys sure were busy, weren’t they? That’s because they didn’t have internet. ;-)

A couple of other beautiful churches (filled with glorious artwork) also awaits you in Weida; and there’s a memorial dedicated to 48 forced labor victims on Friedhofstrasse.

You’d think that walking around Weida you would have burned enough cake calories away to take a rest. Nope, think again. The more cake you eat, the more you gotta exercise.

Good thing Weida’s got an outdoor swimming pool, miniature golf course, and a tennis court. Weida’s zoo doesn’t count as a real sport, but walking around it does count as something active as well as educational.

Weida’s campground is neither educational, nor does it count towards exercising — it’s just pure fun. Although I do have to admit, the scenery around the campground is exceptionally lovely.

I guess if you find yourself on a hiking trail near the campgrounds, that could be considered exercise.

It’s all right, with such a workout you can eat more cake. Num, num, num! :-)

Hidden away in the Harz Mountains in the center of Saxony-Anhalt is the town of Hecklingen, a place where if you’re looking for nightclubs and partying nightlife you’ll be disappointed. However, if you’re looking to see a romantic town of medieval churches and castles, then you’ve gotten to the right place.

Your first castle visit can actually be your hotel room, because that’s what the 17th century Stadtschloss Hecklingen now is.

Castle Schneidlingen didn’t have the same fate. This poor castle isn’t really in ruins — it’s worse. It looks as if this 12th century burg is just downright abandoned. But, do me a favor. Stand here for a few minutes and really look at this magnificent castle, you’ll find the beauty of it; even in this unkempt state.

If you really want to see something beautiful, you need to see Hecklingen’s former monastic church of Saints George and Pancratius. It was built in the 12th century and it’s full of Romanesque sculpture. Plus, it’s the venue for a number of concerts and other festivities.

In the village of Groß Börnecke there’s another church that also likes to get in on the festive fun. The St. Lawrence Church (it’s on a charming, winding, cobblestoned lane) is the site of Hecklingen’s Summer Festival (in August) and holds annual Advent concerts.

The St. Clements Church in the same village isn’t a church any longer (it’s a cultural meeting place), but it still has its pulpit and altar inside.

Over in Cochstedt (another village of Hecklingen) the Sankt Sixit Church still retains its Romanesque origins, but also has a lovely 15th century crucifix and Baroque accents.

Speaking of Romanesque origins, that brings me to the fact that Hecklingen proudly belongs to the Romanesque Route.

And speaking of Cochstedt, west of Hecklingen (and south of its Cochstedt district) lies the Magdeburg/Cochstedt Airport [CSO]. So it’s quite convenient to get here, isn’t it? :-)

You know, you might not even notice that Hecklingen is literally right next door to the city of Magdeburg; and is part of the “Magdeburg Region,” a scenic area that highlights the best of the best.

From what I can see of Hecklingen, there’s no need to go any further.

I don’t know about you all, but I find it interesting when a town’s landmark really is part of the land. Interestingly put, isn’t it? It’s not some church or castle that is Heringen’s landmark, it’s a huge mountain known as the Salzberg (translating to Salt Mountain, but called the Monte Kali).

It’s quite appropriate, as potash mining was done for eons here. What’s potash? According to the dictionary it’s a salt that contains potassium.

Ah, who knew you’d get a science lesson here at MyGermanCity.com! ;-)

Anyway, potash was huge to Heringen’s economy — so it’s only fitting that the town have a Potash Mining Museum. They even have a great way to explain the “science” of it to the kids. Cool!

Going below the surface not your cup of tea? It’s all right, you can see the Salzberg from atop the Bodesruh Memorial. While it might be memorial to Germany’s divided days, it’s also an observation tower that’ll see straight out into the wide Thuringian Forest.

Yes, the Thuringian Forest even though Heringen (Werra) is in Hesse. You see, Heringen’s right on the Thuringian border — and you’ll find former border markings from when East Germany was literally right across the street.

The forest and the Salzberg isn’t your only experience into the great outdoors. Check out the Rohrlache, a nature area great for bird watching, a nice picnic, and a chance to see some rare species of plants that depend on the land’s high salt content.

Of course, my friends, outdoor recreation isn’t all you’ll do here in Heringen, either. You can shop at the Weekly Market (on Thursdays), or you can visit the area that was once Burg Hornberg (a mid-12th century castle), and stop to see the Walterskirche ruins (a church from the 14th century) in a former settlement that was deserted by the end of the 14th century.

Yeah, sounds creepy, but it ain’t.

I guess the only thing left to do is camp out for a night under the stars and the watchful eye of the Salzberg. All that fresh air has made me tired — I sure hope one of the many white storks that live in the area doesn’t try to steal my granola bars. ;-)