If anyone of you out there has the winning lottery numbers, can I have them? Please? Why? I want to buy a castle.

I know it’s a lot to ask, but once you see Schloss Liebenberg in the town of Löwenberger Land, you’ll want one for yourself too. It was built in 1745; and even has its very own lake. It also has a tiny stone church, which is the final resting place for its previous owners. You can stay here if you want, it’s now a hotel.

Schloss Hoppenrade is another 18th century castle within this forested community of 17 villages. Well, it is currently an 18th century Burg built over a 15th century original; that once had a moat.

Still not impressed? Then maybe Castle Löwenberg is more your cup of tea, another Baroque Schloss that was formerly a medieval castle. Close to Castle Löwenberg there’s Löwenberger Land’s Heimatmuseum, which is a local history museum.

Church Löwenberg (Protestant) has an interesting history. It was built in the popular Gothic style in the 13th century, fell into disrepair during the 17th century Thirty Years’ War; and lay in ruins for almost a century before the town rebuilt.

I like the church in the village of Falkenthal. Its ivy covered Baroque & half-timbered tower is the pride of this village’s 700 residents. I can see why.

Also in Falkenthal you’ll find a well-marked former postal route from Berlin to Szczecin, which you do via bicycle.

Gutengermendorf also boasts a 13th century church, as well as a Horse Market every Fall.

Other festivals and events throughout Löwenberger Land’s shires are Family Sports Day (April), Easter concerts, Spring Festival (April), and May Day (May 1).

As you’re off meandering through town, you’ll find a memorial dedicated to victims of a 1945 Death March; and a War Memorial in the village of Teschendorf.

There’s another war memorial (World War I) in the village of Großmutz, as well as a Neo-Gothic church that replaced the original one, after plague and war wiped out almost its entire population (today it has about 250 residents).

Wait until you see how delightful Löwenberger Land really is. I’m wondering if you give me those winning numbers… ;-)

Maybe I’m biased (because I love all things German) but I think the three villages of Hesse’s town of Lahnau can boast some pretty amazing history and quite a few fun festivals.

For the historical part of Lahnau you don’t get much older than the Forum Waldgrimes, part of an old Roman city (Magna Germania), thought to be the “oldest foundations of a building” in the entire country. Impressive, no?

I’d say so, but my opinion doesn’t count. Again, I’m biased, remember? ;-)

Romans aside, Lahnau also has an amazingly gorgeous Evangelical Church in the village of Atzbach, another one in the Waldgrimes, and yet another in Dorlar.

While you’re in Atzbach check out the old Backhaus, I mean Bake House. The other Altes Backhaus in Dorlar is now used for weddings, workshops, etc.

In Waldgrimes there’s a local history museum that’s just grand for explaining so many centuries of history in this Hessian town. You’ll find this Heritage Museum at Friedensstrasse 20.

Also in Waldgrimes are tiny grill hut areas where you can spend a day with the family grilling bratwurst, playing a game of football (a.k.a. soccer), baseball, or sit around telling silly (or bawdy) jokes.

Lahnau’s got more food and merriment during its festivals held throughout the year. Atzbach’s Kirmes (Church Festival) is every June and Waldgrimes’ is on the first weekend of August.

There are two Advent Bazaars every year; Waldgrimes’ is on the 1st weekend of Advent and Atzbach’s a week later. Hmm, shopping! Gotta love it!

I can’t leave without telling you about Lahnau’s Fire Festival in May; and the Ochsenfest, two Summer Festivals, and the Atzbach Fair all in June.

Not to mention the guided cycling tours that are held by the town throughout the Spring and Summer. It’s a nice way to meet the neighbors, get a little exercise, and learn more about the place.

I sure hope you like what you see. Save me a seat at the grill hut, will ya?

If I said that Lenningen was part of the Biosphere Reserve Swabian Alb, would that get your attention? What if I said it was only a few minutes south of Kirchheim unter Teck (OK, 10km), would you be more willing to visit?

What if I said there were caves where you could go spelunking, or pretend you’re Batman?

Oh, I had you at Biosphere Reserve Swabian Alb? Good. I didn’t know how much more I could have kept that up. ;-)

To be quite frank, there isn’t much other than the Biosphere Reserve, which lies within the Swabian Alb (duh!). But, even those of you out there that don’t like nature all that much will be mighty impressed with this UNESCO cultural landscape.

It’s your choice if you’d rather find yourself on hiking trails or take a leisurely bicycle stroll around. Don’t worry, it’s not like you have to travel through all of the Biosphere’s 29 municipalities and 85,000 hectares — just some of it.

Hidden within the Alb near Lenningen are a couple of caves, with the Gußmannshöhle and the Wolfsschluchthöhle (Wolf’s Glen Cave) being two of the most visited.

Don’t think you can only enjoy Lenningen’s part of the Swabian Alb during the warmer months. Winter’s a great time to get your skis waxed, bring your slalom partner and hit the slopes.

Cold weather not your cup of tea? Come inside Lenningen’s Museum of Paper and Book Art. Also within the museum building is the town’s library, where you might not be able to read the books in German, but you never know who you might meet.

Are you still cold? Come into one of Lenningen’s churches. With seven villages you’re sure to find one you like. I think the one in the center of Gutenberg has real charm.

I’m sure glad I didn’t spend all my time out in the Alb or within its caves pretending I was Batman.

Talk about having famous neighbors. Uedem (never heard of it, right?) is a German town bordering Xanten. Oh, and being only a few minutes from the Dutch border, as well.

And just because Uedem isn’t as well-known as her surrounding town doesn’t mean it’s not as lovely and charming as the other(s).

I like it and I think you will, too.

What I like best about Uedem are all the walking and cycling trails through the countryside. Some of the trails are small scenic routes, like the Manor Route. It’s a bicycle route along the Dutch/German border highlighting some of the prettiest castles and manor houses. It’s a doozy of a trail, some 500km, but it’s set up with 16 smaller day-friendly sections.

What’s the point of a castle route without a castle? The Alte Schlüterei was part of a 14th century castle that was used as an office for serfs that needed to pay their “duty” (read — money) to the dukes of the manor. The office was moved out of the castle in the 15th century, but a fire required a need to move it back.

All the better for the dukes to keep their money closer, wouldn’t you say.

Then you’ve got the Lower Rhine Route. You don’t have to do all 2000km of it (you’re staying in Uedem, right?); so you can do as little or as much of it as you wish without feeling guilty.

Other bicycle and hiking routes that bring you through Uedem is the District of Kleve (a cycling route) and the Treasures of the Lower Rhine (both a walking & bike route), and the Kalkar-Xanten-Hamminkeln Route.

If you’re interested maps of these routes are available at the Rathaus (Town Hall) at Mosterstraße 2.

To stay more local, yet see the countryside, I’d suggest a tractor ride. It’s a relaxing and fun way to do it. From May to October Uedem hosts a charming Garden Tour on the Lötzenhof, which is also a nice way to “do” Uedem.

Uedem’s got other sightseeing that doesn’t involve motoring around. You just need to remember to see the Hohe Mühle (High Mill, built 13th century) you can only do it on the weekends from 2:30pm-5pm. The view from the top is extraordinary.

You might have noticed quite a few bronze statues (like the Sailor Fountain) at the Marktplatz. If you like them, there’s plenty more on display at the Stiefenhof.

All that’s left is Uedem’s festivals. March kicks it off with the Niederrheinischer Fahrradtag (Lower Rhine Cycling Day), the Courage Festival in July, an annual Flea Market in August, the Kirmes Church Festival in October, as well as the Antique Market — also in October.

Didn’t I tell you you’ll like Uedem? It should be as famous as its neighbors, right? OK, let’s spread the word. :-)

You know what’s pretty cool about Treuenbrietzen in Brandenburg? I think it’s because it’s not crowded. No, it’s because of its history. No, it’s because of its incredible nature reserve. Oh, I know, it’s its festivals.

I can’t stand it when I argue with myself. So, I’ll settle this once and for all. The answer is all of the above. There were four choices, so it’s not like I could have flipped a coin. ;-)

Why do I say Treuenbrietzen isn’t crowded? How’s this for an answer, because the entire town is more than 211 square kilometers with a population that doesn’t even reach 8,000 residents. It’s these kinds of things that many city dwellers look forward to when getting away.

It seems like Treuenbrietzen has just about as many historical sites as it does square kilometers. The town is particularly proud of their many stone churches from the 12th and 13th centuries. I would really recommend seeing the one in Lobbese (one of Treuenbrietzen’s sixteen villages) and over in Marzahna.

I also wouldn’t leave out the Sankt Marien, a cross-shaped basilica that was also built in the 13th century. This was the church that Martin Luther was banned from preaching back in 1537.

He still held his sermon, just choosing to do it under a tree instead. The tree is known around here as the Lutherlinde.

The former Holy Spirit Chapel (built 1352) was totally destroyed in the Thirty Years’ War; and wasn’t used again until 1936. It’s now a local museum.

Keep walking around, you’ll find parts of the original defense wall (built 1296-1305) and the Pulverturm or Powder Tower. This former ammunition supply tower also is a stork nesting site.

It’ll also be hard to miss the Rathaus. Here’s the skinny on this — it was originally a late 13th century warehouse, but it was rebuilt in the 1600’s; so, it’s old — but not that old.

Throughout town you’ll probably notice many memorials. One is dedicated to the 127 POWs, who were killed by the SS; another to 1000 civilians killed by the Red Army; one is to the local men who lost their lives during the German-Prussian War (1870-71), and one in the Jewish Cemetery for the town’s deported Jewish family.

As if you’ll be up for walking or biking around the Nature Reserve Zarth by the time you’re done in town. OK, stay a night or two so you can get it all in.

Let me tell you this… in the Nature Reserve Zarth you must (must, must) stay on the hiking and biking paths. If you listen to the rules you’ll be rewarded with all sorts of plants (including orchids) and local wildlife.

Despite the strict rules on the nature reserve thing, Treuenbrietzen is a fun-loving town. There’s Carnival in February, a Sports Festival in mid-July, a Ball in October, and an Advent Market on the 1st weekend of Advent.

The biggest attraction is the Sabinchenfestspiele in mid-June. It’s a 10-day affair of concerts, markets, fireworks, and a parade.

Never mind, I take it all back. Treuenbrietzen’s festivals are the clear winner of the coolest part. Let me know if you agree. ;-)

My imaginary trip to the town of Titz didn’t last too long. There’s not a lot of sightseeing within its 16 districts. But, I did fall in love with the countryside and its quaint town center, so I stayed the night just so I could see the sun come up over its vast fields. I must have been in a romantic mood that day. ;-)

It must have been the windmill; it seduced me with its four large wings. But, the windmill was all work since it’s been toiling here in the fields since the 16th century.

Drawn away from the mill, I went off to see the former synagogue in Titz-Rödingen. Today the old house of worship is an information and culture center. There’s even a Jewish cemetery nearby.

Romans were once part of Titz; and the Matronenstein (Matres and Matrones) is one of nine stones from the time. The Reiss-Museum Mannheim houses the original, but a replica is found in Titz’s Rathaus (or Town Hall) and in the village of Rödingen on Hohe Straße.

I saved the last of my sightseeing for the Catherine Chapel. This chapel from the Middle Ages is famous for its stunning wall paintings. I just love old churches, don’t you?

Titz might be a rural town, but it’s not without its celebrations. Carnival’s weather might be a bit chilly, but you’ll be all warm & giddy on the inside thanks to all the merriment, food, and wine.

On Father’s Day you not only get to honor you Papa, but there’s also racing and lots more food. Better yet, treat your dad to a beer. ;-)

It looks like my time in Titz is at an end, but like I said I wanted to watch the sun come up. So, I found a few walking paths and listened to the quiet town slowly come awake; deciding if I wanted to head to nearby Bedburg or Erkelenz.

No, I think I’ll stay here a bit longer.

Picture, if you will, rolling hills of vineyards where music is carried away by the wind. Sounds like the opening sequence of a movie, doesn’t it?

It’s not some Hollywood theatrical trailer, it’s Osthofen in the Rhineland-Palatinate.

All right, so I mentioned vineyards, does that mean Osthofen has wineries? You bet your sweet Riesling it does. Wine making is big business around here; and for two days in September during the Wine Festival (called the Winzerfest) you’ll know why — the stuff just tastes so good.

They pick a new Wine Queen every year; and I’m still trying to figure out how to be a judge.

Wine isn’t the only thing that makes Osthofen cultured. It’s the Art Days, a month long event from March to April; and the Spring Festival (always good for more wine drinking) and the free music concerts held in the park through the summer.

The best is the Osthofener Market and Beer Garden Party. Why? Easy, two days of shopping and beer drinking in August. Need I say more? ;-)

Between pints Osthofen’s got some nice sightseeing; and I mean more than just its beer gardens. The most visited is the Bergkirche, which has been a holy site since the 6th century when a chapel to St. Remigius was built.

Kind of makes the Catholic St. John Church that was built in 1713 pale in comparison, doesn’t it? No, actually — St. John’s and the Kleine Kirche (built 1581) are both lovely.

Other sightseeing you can do around Osthofen (whether by foot or by bicycle) is to check out the Rathaus (built 1902), the Altes Rathaus (1739), and the Jewish Cemetery (with a memorial to the town’s Jewish community lost during the National Socialist period).

A guided tour of Osthofen might be a good idea (available June/July/August for only a few Euro). This way you can hear more on this 2-hour tour about the town’s history than on your own or at the Heritage Museum (open 1st Saturday of the month 9am-11am).

Could you do me a favor? While you’re here, ask around how I can judge that wine queen contest. Thanks! ;-)

How many of us are distracted by shiny things? Haven’t I said that be-oh, look more shiny things. Man, that happens a lot here in the Lower Bavarian town of Viechtach since it’s on the Glass Route.

No, I’m not making that up — it’s a German scenic route, not an Autobahn or small county lane made of glass shards. ;-)

Before I get into how awesome Viechtach is with its castles and festivals, I’ll tell you about the glass. There’s a Crystal Museum with over a thousand examples of, oh look shiny — ah, just kidding. I’m mean the museum has all sorts of crystals and minerals exhibits.

The Glass Barn isn’t just about beautifully cut crystal and glass. This place tells the tales, legends, and myths of the Bavarian Forest, which I forgot to mention in the first place (darn shiny things). ;-)

Before I’m distracted, yet again, I’ll tell you about Viechtach’s castles. You’ve got Castle Kollnburg and the medieval Castle Altnußberg. But, the one you’ve really got to see is Castle Neunußberg.

Every July and August it looks like some Renaissance/Medieval time warp, where Knights and Ladies, jugglers and musicians all come together for a summer full of fun.

Viechtach also has its fair share of grand churches. The Parish Church of St. Augustine is known as the Cathedral of the Bavarian Forest and the St. Anna Chapel (a former cemetery chapel.

With Viechtach’s many villages (there’s more than 50 of them), if I told you about all of the small village churches we’d be here all day. And then, chances are I’d get sidetracked with all the crystal and glass. ;-)

I guess I better get to telling you about the Nostalgia Museum, then. It’s a great example of the town’s daily life through the years; whereas the Museum Viechtach looks more into the town’s economy and cultural life.

Want another look at Viechtach’s cultural life? How about the Street Festival, held the first week of July, and the Heimatfest Kollnburg on August’s first weekend. Then there’s a Carnival Celebration in August.

Wow, all sorts of parties where I can enjoy some great Bavarian music and beer — for which I’ll never be distracted from by shiny things. ;-)

Would it shock you if you’re minding your own business while driving along the A8 Autobahn (from Munich to Salzburg) and ran smack dab into a Woolly Mammoth in the town of Siegsdorf?

Yeah, I’d say that would certainly catch my attention. Aw heck, that might even make me forget about the Alps towering in the background for a minute or two. ;-)

What’s with all the Woolly Mammoth stuff? Easy, my friend, the bones of one was discovered here back in the 1970s.

So? Haven’t the bones of these prehistoric creatures been found before? Yeah, they have, but the Siegsdorfer Mammut is the largest one ever found.

You can see it too at the Southeast Bavarian Natural History Museum, as well as 250 million years of other natural history.

If you buy the “Mammoth Card” you’ll get unlimited access to the museum, as well as entry into the town’s swimming complex.

The other biggest attraction to Siegsdorf is the pilgrimage site of Maria Eck. This Baroque church wasn’t built until 1626 (pretty young compared to some other churches in Germany), but it quickly became a place everyone wanted to see.

Services are still held here on Saturday evenings at 5pm, and on Sunday mornings at 8:15 and 10:15.

Siegsdorf’s Parish Church Maria Conception is another sight that you’ll want to see; that is if you like late 18th century Baroque churches.

If it’s Spring or Autumn you might prefer to hike or cycle the Chiemgau (instead of being indoors). The area is rustic and charming — perfect I would say.

Guided hiking tours are also available if you’re so inclined; just inquire at the Tourist Information Center. Winter hiking is also a fun thing to do here. All you need are some snowshoes.

Other winter activities include skiing, sledding, and tobogganing. Sounds like super fun, just as the tennis, swimming, Nordic Walking, miniature golf, and cycling does in the warmer months.

I wonder what the chances are of running into another Woolly Mammoth around here? It’s OK if you don’t — at least Siegsdorf already has one. ;-)

Usually I start out telling you about where you’ll find a town, sometimes getting a bit philosophical, or giving you a bit of its geography. Not this time, folks. There’s too much to see and do in the Franconian town of Schnaittach, so let’s get right to it.

Start your trip at the Rothenberg Fortress. It stands some 588 meters above Schnaittach in what’s known as the Franconian Jura.

This 18th century Rococo fortress once housed more than 400 soldiers at a time; and it’s built over top the ruins of a previous castle. It’s completely walled in; and its foundation walls stand 16 feet high. I’m thinking it was hard to consider escape when the fortress was used as a prison back in the 17th century.

Rothenberg Fortress is open to visitors from April to October, with guided tours leaving every hour on the hour. And don’t forget, this is Germany — so things start promptly.

So, do yourself a favor and don’t start drinking Bavarian beer just yet. ;-)

Save that for after you’ve visited the Frankish Hops Barn. That’s right, hops. That means beer. Yummy! Yeah, Hops!

Sorry, I forgot myself for a minute there. ;-)

Another museum in Schnaittach is the Jewish Museum of Franconia, housed in the town’s former synagogue (at Nürnberger Straße 3). It’s open on weekends (11am-5pm), but call ahead and you might get in to see it with prior arrangement.

The same could be said for the Heimatmuseum Schnaittach, which is the town’s Local History Museum.

For an outdoor learning experience, follow the green circle signs along the Archaeological Trail, which passes prehistoric and Early Middle Ages sites.

Don’t confuse this with the castle ruins of the Forest Trail, which is also a hiking trail.

Darn, I was so excited that my tour of Schnaittach was almost done so I could grab a beer — I almost forgot about the Evangelical Church Osternohe. Its Gothic winged alter is thought to have come from a Nuremberg master; but either way — the church is totally charming.

Aren’t you glad I just dove right into seeing Schnaittach? What I’d like to do is dive right into my drink — so, if you’ll excuse me. ;-)